Wednesday, January 19, 2011

I have a date... I don't think he's paying for dinner though.

I have bought the ticket and reserved the rental car.
I will be heading back to Texas on Feb 1. Screening on the 2nd, vaccine on the 7th.
Not a moment too soon I think. The pain in my abdomen is getting worse and I'm getting more and more paranoid about it. I was under the impression that Dr. Sardi had debulked quite a bit of tumor but hell- I don't know. I've been duped before. I thought I was 'good' for a while. That some down time to get a plan in place and get it started wouldn't have many drawbacks. If this pain in my abdomen is the cancer taking over then I need to get to my 'arrangements' that I've been putting off. I should do that anyway.
I am stupid paranoid about this though. It's hurting- I won't lie. I'm going through painkillers like an addict. Hey- it's the truth. I still have to function. You don't stop being a Mom because you're in pain. You might slack off a bit, but you can't just throw your hands up in the air and say "I can't be a mom today- I hurt."
So I am leaving work early to go home and lay down before the girls get home.
It's a shame that a week with such a high had to be followed by total crud. I guess at least I had that high, right? Otherwise it would have been just another week followed by total crud.

Well, here's to hoping the next 2 weeks fly by without any complications. Let's get this vaccine show on the road folks!

4 comments:

  1. February 7th seems so close, yet so far away! Take care of yourself and stay strong!
    You are in my thoughts!

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  2. Will be very happy for you when you receive that vacine, I don't think you are paranoid at all...just concerned. Take care.....:-)Hugs

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  3. I'm so sorry you're having so much pain. It's incredibly difficult to push through the day with it, and I know pain killers only help take the edge off. Your girls are so lucky to have a terrific, dedicated mom like you! Many prayers for your recovery dear Rachel.

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  4. I don't know what to say, Rach! Just fight on! Like Mindy says, your girls are so lucky to have you as a mom! Will continue to pray for you!

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