Wednesday, March 30, 2011

What a pain in the

Ask anyone with cancer how they feel about pain pills. I'd imagine the answer would go something like this... "Yeah, they're great when I need them, but I don't want to be a pill-popper, or dependent on them."
Welcome to my world. I'm hurting- almost all the time now. I've had to have my perscription changed. I feel like a druggie. I'm emotional over this in addition to everything else I have to deal with because I'm torn between "I must be taking too much!" and "I'm hurting so bad that I want to scream!"
I wake up hurting, I put off using my painkillers and lay and whine and writhe in pain. But if the pain is controlled- I can function like a normal person. hm. Sounds like a druggie- right? Judge away.
I called in for a refill on my perscription only to find that I couldn't have a refill for 2 more days. The doc told me that if I was having pain that I could take another dose at 3 hours instead of 4 and that's what I was doing. Hence the quick usage. Hearing THAT made me feel even worse.
I will get a new perscription today and hopefully the pharmacy I use won't feel it necessary to judge me. I feel bad enough already, dammit.


  1. What about a pain patch? I've known several people in various types of treatment who used morphine patches and were able to function normally. They got such a low, steady dose that they never felt wasted but the pain was significantly decreased. Could something like that be an option?

  2. Meg has a good idea. The doctor should be making pain relief easy for you, not harder. I am still intending the injections are working and you are seeing progress from them ...

  3. Keep ahead of the pain Rachel, it is not worth suffering just to put off taking a pill for another hour. Don't worry about the drug store, they of all people understand how painful Cancer can be. Keeping you in my heart and prayers....:-)Hugs

  4. I am fighting cancer for the third time and this is exactly how I feel about pain pills. I am so paranoid about getting addicted that I go longer with pain! hahaha this is so true

    follow me on my blog as I am fighting for the third time!

  5. I am sorry to hear you are hurting all the time... no one knows what persistent pain is really like until they have been there. Yes, find a drug store that isn't adding to the emotional pain - before you hand over the prescription, ask to speak to the head Pharmacist. Explain that you are taking these medications for your illness and you don't want the staff making comments or judgments when you have to pick up the prescription. You can be sure they will take good care of you.

  6. I'm not fighting cancer, but because of three neck surgeries am on painkillers and muscle relaxers as I try alternative therapies to help the pain and get me off the meds. I've taken anywhere between 90 and 120 pain pills every month for nearly two years and hate what it is doing to my body, but I, like you, can't function without the relief they provide. But, like the other commenters, don't think you are doing yourself any favors by hurting all of the time.

    p.s. - this is Jolene from the Parkersburg News and Sentinel. I've been lurking on your blog since we met last year. You are beyond inspiring and I pray for you every day.)