Aching

I spent the weekend painting and it's still not done. I want to give a HUGE thanks to Sarah, Tina and Brenda for coming out of the blue to help- you gals kick ass! And thanks to my Dad for, uh, well, where do I start?!?! Thanks to my mother in law for working so hard, my mom for putting my kitchen in order, my stepdad for getting the laundry room taken care of, my little brothers Sean and Luke for the help and Luke's friend, Troy for all the hard work.
I am hell-bent on being in the new house by Friday night. I would like to at least spend 2 nights there with the girls before I'm whisked away to Columbus to have my next surgery. I will likely be there for at least a week. Yee-Haw! Before then I also have to go to work, get bills taken care of, get arrangements for sponsors and donations for the Relay For Life Team, get advertising taken care of for the fundraising wheelchair basketball game, get my disability insurance check on track and a thousand other things I'm sure.
My BIGGEST worry right now is my 3-1/2 year old. She's been acting up a bit lately. She's had a tantrum at least once a day for the last 4 days. I think the stresses that I'm dealing with are starting to take a toll on her. (Hang in there Iris- it will get better. I promise.) Night time is especially hard. I wish I could lay there with her and sleep next to her every night... I wish I could have both girls in bed with me every night- but let's be honest: I would never get any sleep with all the commotion.
It's such a transitional period right now- with the new house and emotionally. I've got to get used to constantly worrying about the cancer coming back, I have to get used to different prominent people in my life and get used to ones who were there not being there so much. My mind wanders and wishes and wants (and whines). You know what they say..."You can want in one hand and shit in the other and see which gets filled first." Such is life. I can only get that which I have control of... and I've found that I have control over VERY little.