It can be hard to find energy these days. Chemo sucks the life right out of you. But I can't NOT do it because at least it's doing SOMETHING instead of nothing at all.
I've taken to just chomping on gum (which I have the horrible habit of smacking it without thinking- my sister HATES it) to keep the chemo taste outta my mouth.
Had a great weekend. Stayed at a cabin at Salt Fork State Park with the in-laws. Sounds like a nightmare if you don't like your in-laws... but I happen to like mine. Iris got to play with her cousin Ava (and get in a wicked fight... well it was more humorous to me) and make up to keep playing. I got to visit with my sisters in law Inga and Jackie. Love both, but don't see them near enough. Inga lives in Pittsburgh, but Jackie only lives about 15 minutes away from me. There's just too much going on in day-to-day lives you know? And you kinda tend to stick to the circle of friends you've had forever. We just seem to intertwine on a family basis. Which is fine- I'm glad she's there to talk to. My Mother-in-law is great to talk to also. Weird, huh? I'm just lucky to have in-laws that I like. Makes my family bigger.
Today I'm in the process of making phone calls to Dallas and Boston. Doc Goodman finally has all the stuff he needs to talk real to me about treatment options. Janet-Marie (his secretary) has called me enough times that I have designated a ringtone SOLELY for his office calling me. Wanna know what it is? Sure you do! It's the instrumental beginning to "Danger Zone" by Kenny Loggins. Why did I pick that? I just KNOW you're asking yourselves. The big question of the day! (Boring Navy story Alert) Well, when I was in the Navy- I worked on fighter jets. Not F-14's, but a better F/A-18 (hee hee)... still, working on fighter, bad-ass planes warrants liking a cheesy- inaccurate Hollywood take on military 'stuff.' And admittedly, I was a goober for 'Top Gun.' Sadly, I never got to work on a flight deck, but I did that crappy work on land.. in the desert. So here is the video... you can't help but get pumped a little by the intro- right? I try to stay stoked about getting another surgery. (and to be honest- I'd rather have another surgery than do even one more round of chemo... that's how much it sucks.)
So I've heard it once today... next time I hear it- it will be Doctor Goodman. I've got to get paperwork to Mary Crowley Cancer Center in Dallas next.
Gotta to the release forms- AGAIN. bah. I loathe paperwork. Just wish I could sign ONE paper and then make a phone call with a password to say "Send my records HERE." instead of faxing crap back and forth. I have a terminal condition, why on earth would I care if someone looked at my records? Maybe someone will stumble across them and know the cure. I'd like to have them published on youtube and become the next biggest viral video. I could care less if people read about my BM three days after surgery. If I had to tell the cute PRN guy about it- I can just put it out there for the world to see. I say the more awareness, the better.
Open my belly
Scrub my guts, make me better
You Da Man, Doctor